I am guilty of doing it myself, but still I have to say - I can get really frustrated by the way we humans seem to want to generalize about other people or compare ourselves with other people. A few examples...
- I posted this link on facebook to an NPR story about the media portrayal of the American South. I know I've used the words "hillbilly" and "redneck" in recent memory myself, as well as imitating a Southern accent (in front of a friend who is from the South...oops), so shame on me! Truly, it's embarrassing when I'm part of the phenomenon I'm critiquing.
- An acquaintance in Mumbai posted this link showing how one of the best musicians in the US, Joshua Bell, played his violin at a subway station in Washington, D.C. -- and only one person stopped. My Mumbaikar pal captioned this, "Americans are ignorant?..." But really, I think the clip says more about humans at large than Americans in particular -- we are so carried forward by our habit energy that we aren't aware of the present moment. But it caught me that he captioned the picture with a generalization about Americans - first, because as an American I'm going to immediately feel defensive, but also because I know that this guy has more exposure to American media than actual Americans, and from my perspective the jump to a not-so-favorable generalization based on a video of a few hundred people one day in a subway station in D.C. betrays a pre-existing view on Americans. I do find it disturbing that people didn't stop and recognize the beauty of what the guy was playing - particularly because I could see myself being one of them - but spinning it into a generalization about 300 million + people is a leap.
- Another acquaintance recently posted a picture on facebook that was intended to be humorous: it was a chart with two columns, one for men and one for women, and under men it had things like "Conquers nations", "Frees slaves", "Discovers America", "Fights terrorists", and under women it had only "Gets more likes on facebook". I am sort of annoyed that this one even bothers me, because I consider it so easily collapsible by any reasonable, fact-based 30-second argument (men didn't do all of that alone, men have historically oppressed women, the things listed under "men" carry with them some cringe-worthy bad effects, there are plenty of notable things for the "women" column, I've not noticed a pattern of more facebook likes for women...) But it does bother me, because clearly some people think there is enough of a kernel of truth to find it funny in the first place. Gender generalizations are probably the most irritating of all to me, because I grew up in a place that still has relatively narrow options for women and I know I've internalized some of the implicit and explicit messages of patriarchy.
I don't entirely understand why I chafe so much against generalizations and comparisons. I think it's likely coming from feeling different in many ways from what is considered normative, as well as from my natural skepticism that the surface view of things is sufficient. I always want to get to the reality of things, and it frustrates me that we are all so subjective, driven to see things from perspectives based on emotional reactions and conditioned values. There must be a way to have our views, to feel things deeply, but still to allow room for others to do the same with different views and feelings and not end up arguing with or marginalizing or generalizing each other.
- I posted this link on facebook to an NPR story about the media portrayal of the American South. I know I've used the words "hillbilly" and "redneck" in recent memory myself, as well as imitating a Southern accent (in front of a friend who is from the South...oops), so shame on me! Truly, it's embarrassing when I'm part of the phenomenon I'm critiquing.
- An acquaintance in Mumbai posted this link showing how one of the best musicians in the US, Joshua Bell, played his violin at a subway station in Washington, D.C. -- and only one person stopped. My Mumbaikar pal captioned this, "Americans are ignorant?..." But really, I think the clip says more about humans at large than Americans in particular -- we are so carried forward by our habit energy that we aren't aware of the present moment. But it caught me that he captioned the picture with a generalization about Americans - first, because as an American I'm going to immediately feel defensive, but also because I know that this guy has more exposure to American media than actual Americans, and from my perspective the jump to a not-so-favorable generalization based on a video of a few hundred people one day in a subway station in D.C. betrays a pre-existing view on Americans. I do find it disturbing that people didn't stop and recognize the beauty of what the guy was playing - particularly because I could see myself being one of them - but spinning it into a generalization about 300 million + people is a leap.
- Another acquaintance recently posted a picture on facebook that was intended to be humorous: it was a chart with two columns, one for men and one for women, and under men it had things like "Conquers nations", "Frees slaves", "Discovers America", "Fights terrorists", and under women it had only "Gets more likes on facebook". I am sort of annoyed that this one even bothers me, because I consider it so easily collapsible by any reasonable, fact-based 30-second argument (men didn't do all of that alone, men have historically oppressed women, the things listed under "men" carry with them some cringe-worthy bad effects, there are plenty of notable things for the "women" column, I've not noticed a pattern of more facebook likes for women...) But it does bother me, because clearly some people think there is enough of a kernel of truth to find it funny in the first place. Gender generalizations are probably the most irritating of all to me, because I grew up in a place that still has relatively narrow options for women and I know I've internalized some of the implicit and explicit messages of patriarchy.
I don't entirely understand why I chafe so much against generalizations and comparisons. I think it's likely coming from feeling different in many ways from what is considered normative, as well as from my natural skepticism that the surface view of things is sufficient. I always want to get to the reality of things, and it frustrates me that we are all so subjective, driven to see things from perspectives based on emotional reactions and conditioned values. There must be a way to have our views, to feel things deeply, but still to allow room for others to do the same with different views and feelings and not end up arguing with or marginalizing or generalizing each other.
1 comment:
Profound thoughts. I know I'm terrible about generalizing, but I do try to remember that there are exceptions. Of course, there's a big difference between making innocent generalizations and sexist/racist comments.
I heard the Joshua Bell thing used in a sermon once, maybe by Rob Bell. Sad story. But I do remember having an amazing musical experience waiting for the El one night. This violinist was amazing, and everyone gathered around him and gave money. People do stop and listen, sometimes, at least.
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