The Life-ness Monster

Not infrequently, I feel like I'm struggling to keep up with life. It feels hard to find time for work, chores, play, and relationships...and I end up sitting on my couch on a Thursday night, acutely aware of the heaps of mess around my apartment -- dishes, laundry, sweeping, etc. -- that I'm not dealing with. Sometimes it feels like a lot of effort just to keep things going, let alone have time for everything else that I really want to do. But there are also moments when, in the midst of feeling stretched by what it takes to live, I realize that I am, in fact, living. I'm doing what needs to be done, I'm doing what it takes to gain and maintain ongoing happiness. I'm realizing that, for the first time in a long time, and probably more deeply than ever before, I'm actually enjoying the everyday life-ness of life. It's not that I never get bored or discouraged; I have a lot of ups and downs, which are evident in this blog. But in general, and right now, I feel happy with who and where I am and where I'm going.